Really?!? He is 3!


You know when you have one of 'those' days.
This morning was one of those days.

I help in Alayna's classroom wednesday mornings
changing out AR/bob books
and taking the kids to test them in the library.
I was a little nervous to take on what seemed to be a big commitment but
I have loved being in Alayna's class and
getting a feel for her friends and teacher.

I was very specific when I was asked to help that I would have to bring my very loud, very active 3 year old who doesn't sit still. I was told oh that is no problem, we have siblings all the time. I told her Jacob is not like other siblings and he might be disruptive but I would try my best to keep him under control.

Each week Jacob and I talk about what is expected of him and how to behave in Teacher's classroom. Then we pack a back pack with a pop tart and a few trains or trucks.

This week we brought along this little set.

Within minutes of arriving in the classroom I could tell Teacher was not in a good mood. Every few seconds "FIRST GRADERS! You are too noisy!" Bark after bark. They hadn't been in class 30 minutes and she had one little gal pulling her 3rd (of 4) cards. I was getting a little irked. You couldn't hear a pin drop, but it was not much more than breathing and a whisper here and there.

Side note: Talking to another parent at the first grade homework night she said her husband really liked Teacher's energy and maybe they should have had their daughter in Teacher's class. I told her that it was interesting because I had been thinking how she is so different(meaning enthusiastic, fun, happy, smiling) tonight with the parents than what I see in class (the 45 minutes I am there once a week)

As I was sorting books and folders getting ready to leave Jacob let out a couple "choo choos". She let me know that was definitely not acceptable today. Neither was touching the chart stand.
Teacher had told me previously I could leave him in the classroom while I went to the library. But I knew today was not the day to leave him there. So to the library we went with his trains. As I start testing (1st graders need the tests read to them) I turned my back and Jacob slipped out and went back to class. I prayed he would be quiet. Not minutes later Jacob shows up in the library with the look of "I'm in trouble" so I made him sit on the chair next to me. He was upset then cried through the last 2 testers. Frustrated I went back to class to record scores and switch out books. He couldn't find his train set. I suspected Teacher had taken it away. I had Jacob look at books while I finished up. I didn't want to bother Teacher while she was working with a student, so I quietly asked Alayna if she knew where the train was. Her neighbor said Teacher B had it. Surprised, we left and went to Teacher B. She said Teacher and Jacob were 'fighting' and 'yelling' over it so Teacher B had to step in. She took Jacob to the Library and kept the toy.
Really? Yelling? I apologized. Teacher B was understanding and reminded me Teacher has no kids. But still... I left and the tears came unstoppably by the time I got to the sidewalk. Why didn't Teacher say anything? Why didn't she pull me aside and say Jacob was too noisy with his toy so Teacher B took it? Why didn't she say it was ok to bring him when I am feeling it's not? Why did she get upset when a 6 year was playing(quietly fidgeting) with her bracelet? Seriously lighten up! Why did she choose 1st grade? Why was she so ornery today? Why did I agree to do the testing when I knew I would have to bring Jacob?

I wasn't sure if I was crying because I was embarrassed or if it was because I was mad. (Mostly likely it was because I haven't slept for 3 nights with this stupid head cold). As I watched Jacob run to the car zigzagging and around in circles I asked do I really want to bridle Jacob's energy? Yes some days, but no not really. I love his energy and love for life. I don't want him to be docile, complacent or resigned. He is going to want to touch everything and see what is in every box. Because he is 3!
Then my mind started really going. Worrying about Alayna and the negativity in the classroom. I have felt it before but today was especially negative from the minute I walked in. I don't want that be Alayna's environment for 7.5 hours a day. I have to remind myself she is a resilient and bright little girl who really doesn't allow anyone to make up her mind..So I am not too worried, but still so bugged.

Now a request for advice....
Parent Teacher Conferences are tomorrow.
Do I bring this up?
Am I being too sensitive?

This is Jacob....Now you see him....


Now you don't. He is fast huh?



Stacy said...

I would, it will make you feel better and maybe you and the teacher can get on the same page.

Wendy said...

Grrr...I think I would bring it up but not at teacher conference. I think the conference is about Alayna and your helping in the class room should be brought up outside of that.
I do wonder why she picked 1st grade. Makes you wonder how bad she might be when you are NOT there. If I liked the principle more I would suggest talking to her, but I don't!
Just tell her that you enjoy working in the class room but will need to stop as you can tell that she is bothered by Jacob and his energy. Then let's see what she says. Good grief! You're a volunteer, and you should be made to feel guilty or embarrassed when you disclosed up front the conditions of your help!

Lindsey said...

Wow. My heart hurts for you and that frustrating situation. I'll be willing to bet that by the time you go to PTC, emotions will have settled and you and Teacher will be able to have a good talk about it and maybe, MAYBE even laugh about it. After all, he IS 3, just like you said. What do we do with 3 year old boys!?!? Augh! I remember when Deacon was 3 and we went to a practice and he ran fearlessly out on to the practice field right in the middle of a play. I about had a heart attack and we haven't been back since, thank you very much.

snakeriverwalton said...

i think you can bring it up after you discuss Alayna, because when else does she have a minute to focus on what you are saying?

As an omen, my verification word is "bleware".

Wendy said...

Except that you only get 15 minutes, Alayna is present, usually they're running late and rushing you through as there's another parent tapping her foot waiting to be seen. That's all. Just saying....(Or maybe I'm just too long winded? That could be true too!)

CrazyinIdaho said...

I wish wish wish we lived next door so I could watch Jacob for you so you could volunteer. my advice is to ask if there are things you can take home to do to help in the class room. (cut out art things, etc.) Thats what I ended up doing after taking Sam to do reading in Emily's class and he pooped his pants big time! Can you say mortified! What Fun! I personally would not bring it up at PTC, so you can keep it positive for Alayna. But that is non confrontational me. In Jacob's defense little boys are awesome, and he is one of the sweetest!

Emily Oman said...

I know we already talked, but reading this makes the protective sister/aunt in me want to march on over to that school and make some fur fly!! Maybe an email? That's what I did with Kennedy's tumbling teacher and I felt so much better and was able to proofread my thoughts! :) xoxo